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What Stories Do You Tell Yourself About Other People?
We are storytelling creatures, and our personal history always informs the story we tell about our present experience. Where we can get into trouble with this is when we fail to recognize the degree to which past pain is overriding or distorting our experience of the present (especially when the present is more ambiguous than we are acknowledging) — in those moments we are no longer experiencing the present fully or truthfully, but rather are significantly re-experiencing the past. Learning to recognize when this is happening is crucial to living well, both so we can return to a more accurate read of the present moment (with more humility for acknowledging all that we are unsure about), but even more so in order to help our evoked historical pain to further heal. This is the beautiful (and challenging) gift of old pain resurfacing — we get another chance to be with it in more constructive, healing ways.
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