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Are You Grieving or Whining?

Are You Grieving or Whining?

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It can be rather mean to tell someone in pain to, “Quit your whining!” And yet, I have discovered in my own journey of healing, and in my work with clients, that not all expressions of pain are aiming for healthy grieving. Sometimes we (myself included!) are tempted to whine, complain, gripe about something, unconsciously pretending we are grieving, but actually blocking those around us from providing the comfort, support and nourishment that our pain needs in order to heal. In this video I explore this fascinating (and often tragic) pattern we humans are prone to, unpacking some of what we’re potentially aiming for, and what we need to aspire towards instead (for the sake of our healing and the potential joy and peace that can become possible). It is still typically unkind to tell someone to just “quit whining,” but we do need wise, compassionate invitations to shift out of complaining and deepen into our actual sorrow in order that we can receive the care we’re longing for.

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