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You either Contract or Expand Around Your Loss (A Quote by Nick Cave)

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Faith, Hope and Carnage, by Nick Cave and Seán O’Hagan
0374607370You either go under, or it changes you, or, worse, you become a small, hard thing that has contracted around an absence. Sometimes you find a grieving person constricted around the thing they have lost; they’ve become ossified and impossible to penetrate, and, well, other people go the other way, and grow open and expansive. …[T]his will happen to everybody at some point – a deconstruction of the known self. It may not necessarily be a death, but there will be some kind of devastation. … And it shatters them completely, into a million pieces, and it seems like there is no coming back. … But in time they put themselves together piece by piece. And the thing is, when they do that, they often find that they are a different person, a changed, more complete, more realised, more clearly drawn person. I think that’s what it is to live, really – to die in a way and to be reborn.
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