As parents of pre-teens know well, every child moves at a different pace. Some children feel like little teenagers at the age of nine and others still act fairly childlike until they reach their teens. How I conduct therapy with pre-teens depends on what feels comfortable to the child.
Transitions Counselors' Blog
For a complete listing of posts visit the Blog Archive.
Counseling with Pre-Teens (Ages 10-14): Kristin’s Approach
October 28th, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: Parents
Counseling with Children (Ages 4-11): Kristin’s Approach
October 23rd, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: Parents
Talking is an integral part of counseling with adults. Adults are able to step back and talk about what is going on in their mental and emotional processes. Much of adult counseling is helping adults to further develop their ability to understand and manage their internal experiences. The ability to have perspective on one’s internal world does not develop for most people until they reach their teens. While children are able to describe what is going on around them and can identify feelings, for the most part they are not able to have an objective view of what is going on inside of them. Without this ability it is necessary to conduct therapy with children differently than how one would conduct therapy with an adult.
Study Finds that Predictable, Required Time Off Reaps Big Benefits
October 19th, 2009 by Sean SlevinIntended Audience: General
I recently came across an article in the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) that makes for an interesting follow-up to my post last month about the importance and difficulty of Sabbath rest. The article looks at a study published this October in the Harvard Business Review (HBR) that found that backing away from the intense, always working, 24/7 way of life yields measurable improvements in not just work quality and output but also in employee satisfaction.
Couple’s Counseling: Why I Don’t Take Sides
September 18th, 2009 by Sean SlevinIntended Audience: Dating, Married
Sometimes when a couple comes in for marital counseling they both, on some level, (and perhaps only unconsciously) want the counselor to take their side and help them change their spouse. This is an interesting dynamic and one which, if I succumbed to, would actually not be good for either spouse or for their marriage. So what I seek to do is tricky: I seek to be on everyone’s side, and also no one’s side. What I mean is that I seek to be there for both spouses individually, but also be there for the marriage.
Review: Report on ADHD
September 8th, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: General, Parents
Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder is one of the most common psychological diagnoses for children. Some estimate that between 8-10% of school aged children are affected by ADHD. So if you are at all involved with children, chances are that you know a child with ADHD. Your child may have ADHD. How can you tell if your child has ADHD? What should you consider when picking a doctor to diagnose and treat your child? What about medications for ADHD? These questions are all addressed in a thorough and relatively reader friendly report available for download from Consumer Reports (CR) (links to the report are in the footnotes).
The Art of Stopping
September 1st, 2009 by Sean SlevinIntended Audience: Christians, General
As I’ve grown in my own awareness in the past few days of my need for a vacation I have been reflecting once again on the faith involved in choosing to cease from one’s labors for a season. Regardless of one’s religious beliefs, the act of taking a break from one’s labors (and/or other kinds of ceasing) can be inherently scary–whether it be for 10 minutes or 10 days.
Why Parenting is Difficult: Loving the Hard to Like
August 10th, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: General, Parents
Have you ever stopped in horror and realized that at that moment of time you are feeling hate towards your child? Or maybe you have found that while you love your child you really don’t LIKE them. Or perhaps somewhere deep down inside you feel disappointed about some of the qualities of your child. (For example, you always dreamed of playing baseball with your son, but you had two girls instead, or your son doesn’t want to play baseball, or your son has physical/mental limitations and can’t play baseball.) These are things that many parents feel but have a hard time telling even a counselor (whom is bound by law to never tell another soul). This is one of the difficult things about parenting: you don’t get to choose your child.
Why Parenting is Difficult: Loving and Letting Go
July 21st, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: General, Parents
Parenting is a deeply vulnerable endeavor. Here is this young person who is simultaneously deeply intertwined with the persons of the parents and yet is also separate and who needs to go through a process of separation with the parents. Separation of any kind is painful. The deeper the love and connection between two people, the more painful the separation is. There is probably no deeper connection than that of a parent and their child. No wonder parenting is difficult!
E.D. Drug Ad Critique: Cialis
July 15th, 2009 by Sean SlevinIntended Audience: Married, Men
(Note: This blog post contains frank discussion of male anatomy. It may not be appropriate for viewing in your workplace or in the presence of children.) Consumer Reports AdWatch has another helpful TV advertisement critique. This one is regarding Cialis, a drug for treating ED (link to the video is in the footnote).
Why Parenting is Difficult: Introduction to the Series
July 11th, 2009 by Kristin SlevinIntended Audience: General, Parents
Do you ever find yourself in situations with your child thinking, “Why is this so difficult?!?!” For something that is as old as creation (or nearly) you would think that by now we humans might have figured out a thing or two about parenting. And we have, sort of. It is just that there aren’t any tricks or magic formulas that can make parenting a breeze. There are things that can make parenting easier. This series will: explore some of the things that make parenting difficult; and offer directions that parents can pursue to help make parenting easier.
